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Weight Loss Gimmicks

There are a lot of ways to lose weight: exercise more, eat less, go on a diet, etc. Most people prefer to take the proven and tested routes to get to their goals, others, however, try to take shortcuts to reach their destination. Here are the top 10 most ridiculous weight loss gimmicks of all time. Do they work? Well, you can be the judge of that!

10. The Air Climber
The Air Climber is no ordinary step machine, this amazing device is powered by “Air Technology” and is your one stop solution for losing weight, getting your cardio workout, and toning your abs. Created by Brenda Dygraf, international fitness expert and U.S. Aerobic Champion, this weight loss gadget is a fat man’s dream come true. But for $119.97, you’re better off getting a pair of Nike jogging shoes that will pretty much do the same thing.

9. The Sauna Suit
This silver suit that looks like something you’d see on Star Trek will literally make your excess weight evaporate. Too bad the suit has to dehydrate your body to work, but hey, if you’re fan a of Star Trek you might enjoy running around the beach in the blazing sun wearing this. God knows you probably need to lose a bit of weight.

8. The Shake Weight
When it first came out, everyone was talking about the “Shake Weight” and it gained so much attention that it was actually featured on the Ellen Show. This fitness gadget presumably works by using “Dynamic Inertia” technology which ignites your arm, chest, and shoulder muscles all at once. The “Shake Weight’s” effectiveness wasn’t the reason it garnered so much attention, it was actually the interesting commercials that made it popular. Just check them out on YouTube for a quick laugh.

7. PowerPops
Eat candy, lose weight. Remember what you’re grandma told you: “If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.” Apparently, the new “Power Pop” is Hollywood’s latest method to stay sweet and lose weight. These little things will suppress the appetite and food cravings, increase energy levels, and burn fat and calories in a safe and natural way. Yeah, sure. The only thing it’s going to do is make you drop by your dentist sooner then you’d thought. Though if Britney Spears is using it, then it must work, right?

6. Slimming Belts
These have been around for ages and your grandma has even probably used a slimming belt once in her lifetime to make an impression on your grandpa. I’m not sure how long these have been around, but I’m pretty sure these have been along for quite a while. Come on folks, you can’t expect to hold a coke in one hand a double cheeseburger in the other and expect that a vibrating belt around your thighs is going to magically lose those pounds. Don’t believe me? Just ask your grandma!

5. The Slender Shaper
“Simple, fast and effective massaging exercise belt utilizing a unique, invigorating, dual oscillating system….” You get the idea. For some reason or the other, people actually think they can just slip on a belt for a few hours and get that beach body they crave. It’s just not gonna happen. You could go to sleep with this thing around your waist and I bet you wouldn’t notice a thing. Oh well, I guess people need to make a living.

4. Dr. Lawton’s Guaranteed Fat Reducer
The “fat reducer” invented by Dr. Walton in 1922 promised to reduce the weight of any part of your body by using gentle manipulation. The doctor himself apparently lost over 50 pounds using his device, and offers a 11 day money-back guarantee in case it doesn’t work out for you. I can only imagine what twenty fat reducing machines could do if they were attached to a 500 pound man! If you’ve got any massaging devices they should have the same effect as this. If only Dr. Walton was alive to tell us what on earth he was thinking of when he actually invented this!

3. The Chocolate Diet
According to the website, studies have shown that the cacao bean (the source of all chocolate) has astounding health benefits and that new studies are being carried out as you read this. Eat chocolate, lose weight. Another one of those fantasies fat kids have that will probably never come true. They even tell you that running won’t help you lose weight, and that eating chocolate is the only way to lose weight that works and is easy all at once. Probably just a clever marketing ploy to get you to buy some specific brand of “magical” chocolate. Chocolate frogs, for you Harry Potter fans.

2. The SMART™ Device
The SMART™ (Sensor Monitored Alimentary Restriction Therapy) is a custom made, non-surgical, clinically validated medical device that helps slow down your food intake so that you feel more satisfied and full more easily. I’m not sure why anybody would buy this if drinking a few cups of water before eating can produce the same exact effects of this device. Oh, but water doesn’t have a fancy name and a trademark sign after it.

1. Equmen’s “Core Precision Undershirt”
The “Core Precision Undershirt” is no ordinary undershirt, this amazing garment is engineered with HELIX-MAPPING™technology and does everything from improving your posture to increasing your blood flow. If that doesn’t get you excited, they also have underwear with “butt lifting technology”. Who can resist that? Their website even has a page that tells you when you can wear the shirt, which is pretty much always because they’ve listed almost every single activity from “walking in the street” to “golfing”. This is one of the best weight loss gimmicks yet!

Kevin Bender

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